"I think that you are immune to the temptations of religion. If you are not, I cannot help you, any more than I could keep you from acquiring a drug habit. A religion is sometimes a source of happiness and I would not deprive anyone of happiness. But it is a comfort appropriate for the weak, not for the strong - and you are strong." - from Friday, by Robert Heinlein

"If I had a boy scout, I could make a fire by rubbing his hind legs together." - from Friday, by Robert Heinlein

"The coldest depth of hell is reserved for people who abandon kittens." - from Friday, by Robert Heinlein

"Unless you plan to kill him immediately thereafter, never kick a man in the balls. Not even symbolically. Or perhaps especially not symbolically." - from Friday by Robert A. Heinlein

"Do what you like, the cock is mine for good;
I'll eat him there in spite of every one." - from the Nun's Priest Tale, in the Cantebury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer

"Does convalescence make everyone irresponsibly horny?" - from Friday by Robert A. Heinlein

"I've about decided funny's the best thing in men, I'm talking about aside from money and your basic manageability." - from Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris

"You wanta know what would happen if somebody had plugged Hitler when he was cute little Adolf? There wouldnta been any Hitler, no. But sure as shit there woulda' been somebody else - maybe Kurt Von Fuckmeister - who woulda come along anyway, and maybe old Fuckmeister was even smarter than Adolf, so much smarter that he's slower and cagier, built a war machine five times better than Hitler's, put his boys to work on an A-bomb in 1945, and then dropeed the big one on London. Roosevelt surrenders. Fuckmeister conquers the world. Heil Fuckmeister! Six million dead? Shit, chicken feed. Sixty million...six hundred million - those are Fuckmeister numbers!" - David Levinson, from The Crow: Clash by Night by Chet Williamson

"I want a fried chicken dinner with gravy on the taters, I want to shit in your hat, and I got to have Mae West sit on my face, because I am one horny motherfucker." - Toot, from the Green Mile by Stephen King

"Popular theology is a massive inconsistency derived from ignorance...the gods exist because nature herself has imprinted a conception of them on the minds of men." - Cicero from De Natura Deorum, I, 16

"She's agnostic. Her mind is open. She's not trapped by dogma. She's intelligent, she's tough, and she's very professional. She's just the person we need in this situation." - from Contact by Carl Sagan

"'God can make a signal come from the bunghole of the Little Bear if he wants. Excuse me, but you're gotten me riled up. God can do anything.' 'Anything you don't understand, Mr. Rankin, you attribute to god. God for you is where you sweep away all the mysteries of the world, all the challenges to our intelligence. You simply turn off your mind and say God did it.'" - from Contact by Carl Sagan

"What Beatrice had done with her face, actually, was what any plain girl could do. She had overlaid it with dignity, suffering, intelligence, and a piquant dash of bitchiness." - from The Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

"The visitor from outer space made a serious study of Christianity, to learn, if he could, why Christians found it so easy to be cruel. He concluded that at least part of the trouble was slipshod storytelling in the New Testament. He supposed that the intent of the Gospels was to teach people, among other things, to be merciful, even to the lowest of the low. But the Gospels actually taught this: Before you kill somebody, make absolutely sure he isn't well connected. So it goes." - from Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

"All you umpires, back to the bleachers. Referees, hit the showers. It's my game. I pitch, I hit, I catch. I run the bases. At sunset I've won or lost. At sunrise, I'm out again, giving it the old try. And no one can help me. Not even you." - from Coda, in Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

"No wonder books stopped selling, the critics said. But the public, knowing what it wanted, spinning happily, let the comic books survive." - Captain Beatty, from Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

"I guess I'm everything they say I am, all right. I haven't any friends. That's supposed to prove I'm abnormal. But everyone I know is either shouting or dancing around like wild or beating up one another. Do you notice how people hurt each other nowadays?" - Clarisse, from Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

"The people of Krikkit, are, well, you know, they're just a bunch of real sweet guys, you know, who just happen to want to kill everybody. Hell, I feel the same way some mornings." - His High Judgmental Supremacy, Judiciary Pag, L.I.V.R, Chairman of the Board of Judges at the Krikkit War Crimes Trial, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"There is an art, it says, or, rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"Then he had thought about what his position actually was and the renewed shock had nearly made him spill his drink. He drained it quickly before anything serious happened to it. He then had another quick one to follow the first one down and check that it was all right. He poured a drink down his other throat with the plan that it would head the previous one off at the pass, join forces with it, and together they would get the second to pull itself together. Then all three would go off in search of the first, give it a good talking to. He felt uncertain as to whether the fourth drink had understood all that so he sent down a fifth to explain the plan more fully and a sixth for moral support." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"Eccentrica Gallumbits, did you ever meet her? The triple-breasted whore of Eroticon Six. Some people say her erogenous zones start some four miles from her actual body. Me, I disagree, I say five." - Ford Prefect, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"After awhile an animal - a deer perhaps - would appear from out of the trees and watch him cautiously. Ford would continue to smile at it, his eyes would soften and shine, and he would seem to radiate a deep and universal love, a love which reached out to embrace all of creation. A wonderful quietness would descend on the surrounding countryside, peaceful and serene, emanating from this transfigured man. Slowly the deer would approach, step by step, until it was almost nuzzling him, whereupon Ford Prefect would reach out to it and break its neck." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"Make it totally clear that this gun has a right end and a wrong end. Make it totally clear to anyone standing at the wrong end that things are going badly for them. If that means sticking all sort of spikes and prongs and blackened bits all over it then so be it. This is not a gun for hanging over the fireplace or sticking in the umbrella stand, it is a gun for going out and making people miserable with." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"A doctor, a logician, and a marine biologist had also just arrived flown in at phenomenal expense from Maximegalon to try to reason with the lead singer who had locked himself in the bathroom with a bottle of pills and was refusing to come out till it could be proved conclusively to him that he wasn't a fish. The bass player was busy machine-gunning his bedroom and the drummer was nowhere on board. Frantic inquiries led to the discovery that he was standing on a beach on Santraginus V over a hundred light-years away where he claimed he had been happy for over a half an hour now and had found a small stone that would be his friend." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"Their songs are on the whole very simple and mostly follow the familiar theme of boy-being meets girl-being beneath a silvery moon, which then explodes for no adequately explored reason." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"I think we were probably not very well suited, we never seemed to be happy doing the same things. We always had the greatest arguments over sex and fishing. Eventually we tried to combine the two, but that only led to disaster, as you can probably imagine." - Gargravarr, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"...More controversial than Oolon Colluphid's latest blockbusting title "Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Sex but Have Been Forced to Find Out." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women, and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures form Alpha Centauri." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"During a recitation by their poet Master Grunthos the Flatuent of his poem "Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning" four of his audience died of internal hemorrhaging and the President of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one of his own legs off." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"Then why do you do it? What is it? The girls? The leather? The mochismo? Or do you just find that coming to terms with the mindless tedium of it presents an interesting challenge?" - Ford Prefect, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"There's an infinite amount of monkeys outside who want to talk to us about this script for Hamlet they've worked out." - Arthur Dent, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"The point is that I am now a perfectly safe penguin, and my colleague here is rapidly running out of limbs!" - Ford Prefect, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"My legs are drifting off into the sunset...my left arm's come off too. Hell, how am I going to operate my digital watch now?" - Arthur Dent, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it." - Arthur Dent, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the Galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still know where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with." - from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

"I suffer bleak moods during which I believe the world must be a meaningless place of random actions and reactions, where there is no worthwhile purpose to life, where all is emptiness and aches and pointless cruelty. This was not one of those times." - From the book 'Twilight Eyes' by Dean Koontz

"In each other we've found joy and a reason to live, more than we ever thought we'd have. Now there's a temptation to play turtle, to pull our heads into our shells, to ignore the rest of the world. There's a temptation to enjoy what we have together and to say to hell with everyone else. And for awhile maybe we'd be happy like that. But only for awhile." - From the book 'Twilight Eyes' by Dean Koontz

"All we can hope for is a little happiness with small circle of friends with a couple people we love - and the rest of the world be damned." - From the book 'Twilight Eyes' by Dean Koontz

"She shorted out my logic circuits, damn it. She was different from anyone I had ever known, with puzzling depths and dark secrets, and it seemed to me that I dared not respond to her casually and forthrightly as I would have responded to anyone else." - From the book 'Twilight Eyes' by Dean Koontz

"Are you still with me? You probably don't want to play god anymore. What gets into him sometimes? Don't you wonder?" - From the book 'Twilight Eyes' by Dean Koontz